[Good for you, Ray, but they're not the same person.
His shoulder burns where Raleigh touches it, he's just-- it's too hot, there's too much heat in here, the fire is threatening to engulf him again. Chuck things himself to be a rather tough guy, to swallow his feelings and not give anything away and maybe that's why this is so hard for him to deal with.
Chuck throws the window open and leans against it, for once Alaska works in his favor and it's nice. It's cool. It's how it should be. There's no fire, there's no danger, he's not going to burn alive.
He spends nearly a minute there before he feels more human, more like himself again and he can wander towards the kitchen.]
[ Raleigh's in the middle of pouring himself a cup of water too, when his gaze wanders out across the living room to spot where Chuck's standing by the open window. Very quickly, he looks back at the glass in his hand. The need to go over there is strong enough without him looking at Chuck, too.
When Chuck wanders into the kitchen, Raleigh's proffers up a glass of ice water. ] Drink the whole glass, and I'll get you something stronger.
[It really, really is not Raleigh's fault that he's being so difficult but it's so, so easy to take his stress out on him anyway. To snap and snarl and push because Raleigh can take it. He doesn't just roll over and cry, he stands his ground and it's really fucking annoying when he does it.
[ He knows how to play it, because they've done this song and dance so many times that it's all muscle memory, now, for Raleigh to shove back when Chuck takes it out on him. In a pointed move, Raleigh steps between Chuck and the cabinet where they keep their liquor.
The glass is still outstretched. It's not a necessity for Chuck to drink water, but Raleigh's pushing it all the same. ]
You're not touching anything until you finish this.
[No, it's not necessary that he drink any water and Chuck knows it and he just wants to be as contrary as possible with him right now. Say go left and he'll go right because of the pure fact that it's not what you said to do, even if it makes life more difficult for him. Because at least then he will have made his own fucking choice and no one, not even his fucked up head has any power over him.]
[ Chuck could easily step around him, but he won't -- he'll push at Raleigh until Raleigh gives in and moves aside, because that's what Chuck does when he's like this, even if he doesn't enjoy doing it. Raleigh just clutches the glass a little harder and grits his teeth, hard enough to ache a little, because he doesn't want to do this, either. He knows how to push back, stand his ground, dig his heels in to get what he's asking for, but he doesn't like the necessity of it.
Chuck could go around him but why do that when he could just go through him, even if it is a little bit more work, it's a lot more satisfactory to grab Raleigh by the collar of his shirt and push him back, back until he hits the counter.]
[ Water spills out all over his hand as he's shoved backwards, but Raleigh ignores it, setting the half-full glass aside on the counter to grab the hand closed around the collar of his shirt.
Raleigh doesn't try to pry the fingers away, but he keeps up his glare. ] You're gonna have to make me.
[ Nevermind that Chuck kind of already did. Raleigh digs his back in against the counter; he's not moving anywhere. ]
[Why do you always have to be such a prick, Raleigh. A constant pain in the ass (not the good kind). Maybe if Chuck were a better person, he'd feel bad about taking his anger out on Raleigh, when he's really just angry at himself for being so fucking loser but he's not. A better person, that is.
This is who he is. Someone who pushes everyone he loves away as hard as he fucking can, purely for the sake of it. Because he can. Because it's something he controls.
Chuck makes a disgusted noise, throwing Raleigh's hand off and giving him a little shove before he steps back-- and then around him to reach for the cabinet.]
Raleigh doesn't budge or try to make it easier for Chuck to step around him
at first, but he grips the counter behind him harder and exhales all at
once, hating the anger that's still -- even after all this time -- an
instinctual response to Chuck's aggression. Chuck plays him easier than
anyone he's ever met.
Raleigh turns towards Chuck, finally moving away from the cabinet, if only
to look at him better. ] Chuck, look --
[ Raleigh tilts his head back to avoid getting poked in the face, but he fixes Chuck with a hard stare around Chuck's finger, only just barely refraining from batting it away.
The frantic fervor of Chuck's anger both desperate and pointless. Raleigh is gearing towards anger too, if he's not there already, but for all the wrong, selfish reasons. Raleigh tries calming himself. He's gritted his teeth up until now, but he gentles his tone. ] You gotta know that's not gonna help.
[Good. Maybe Chuck wants him to be angry, maybe he wants a good, solid fight from him because there's no one else that pushes back like Raleigh does and he likes that.
He glares at Raleigh as he unscrews the top of the bottle and following in his partner's shining example, takes a drink from it.]
[ He almost withstands it - holding still as if to not startle himself into emotion again but, at the last second, his face tightens and gives way to anger. Chuck has no right --
He does, perhaps, but. For the first time tonight, Raleigh wants to put distance between him and Chuck, and even Raleigh knows that would be a bad idea. He doesn't know what the best idea is, here.
Tearing that bottle from Chuck's hands isn't one of them, but he flexes his hands behind his back anyway. ] We're all fucking experts.
[It's what Chuck is aiming for. To push and push hard until Raleigh fights back. He likes it when Raleigh fights him, as sadistic as that sounds but he also knows exactly where to hit when he wants to hurt someone. So he takes a drink and rolls his eyes.]
[ He's just -- tired of it, the same song and dance they do every time this happens. It's not necessary, is the thing. Chuck knows it's not.
Chuck doesn't want Raleigh to help him, would rather push Raleigh away before letting that happen, and it's that, more than the barbed comment Chuck throws at his way, that has Raleigh pulling his lips over a snarl and shoving past Chuck, away from the counter, just. Away from him.
If Chuck's looking for a fight, he's gonna have to throw the first punch, because Raleigh sure as hell isn't feeling charitable tonight. ]
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His shoulder burns where Raleigh touches it, he's just-- it's too hot, there's too much heat in here, the fire is threatening to engulf him again. Chuck things himself to be a rather tough guy, to swallow his feelings and not give anything away and maybe that's why this is so hard for him to deal with.
Chuck throws the window open and leans against it, for once Alaska works in his favor and it's nice. It's cool. It's how it should be. There's no fire, there's no danger, he's not going to burn alive.
He spends nearly a minute there before he feels more human, more like himself again and he can wander towards the kitchen.]
Shit, we need something stronger than water.
no subject
When Chuck wanders into the kitchen, Raleigh's proffers up a glass of ice water. ] Drink the whole glass, and I'll get you something stronger.
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[It really, really is not Raleigh's fault that he's being so difficult but it's so, so easy to take his stress out on him anyway. To snap and snarl and push because Raleigh can take it. He doesn't just roll over and cry, he stands his ground and it's really fucking annoying when he does it.
It's exactly what he needs.]
Unless that's vodka I'll pass.
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[ He knows how to play it, because they've done this song and dance so many times that it's all muscle memory, now, for Raleigh to shove back when Chuck takes it out on him. In a pointed move, Raleigh steps between Chuck and the cabinet where they keep their liquor.
The glass is still outstretched. It's not a necessity for Chuck to drink water, but Raleigh's pushing it all the same. ]
You're not touching anything until you finish this.
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[No, it's not necessary that he drink any water and Chuck knows it and he just wants to be as contrary as possible with him right now. Say go left and he'll go right because of the pure fact that it's not what you said to do, even if it makes life more difficult for him. Because at least then he will have made his own fucking choice and no one, not even his fucked up head has any power over him.]
Move. I mean it.
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Whatever. If Chuck needs it --
Raleigh shakes his head once, sharp. ]
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Chuck could go around him but why do that when he could just go through him, even if it is a little bit more work, it's a lot more satisfactory to grab Raleigh by the collar of his shirt and push him back, back until he hits the counter.]
I said move.
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Raleigh doesn't try to pry the fingers away, but he keeps up his glare. ] You're gonna have to make me.
[ Nevermind that Chuck kind of already did. Raleigh digs his back in against the counter; he's not moving anywhere. ]
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This is who he is. Someone who pushes everyone he loves away as hard as he fucking can, purely for the sake of it. Because he can. Because it's something he controls.
Chuck makes a disgusted noise, throwing Raleigh's hand off and giving him a little shove before he steps back-- and then around him to reach for the cabinet.]
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[ He hates fighting with Chuck.
Raleigh doesn't budge or try to make it easier for Chuck to step around him at first, but he grips the counter behind him harder and exhales all at once, hating the anger that's still -- even after all this time -- an instinctual response to Chuck's aggression. Chuck plays him easier than anyone he's ever met.
Raleigh turns towards Chuck, finally moving away from the cabinet, if only to look at him better. ] Chuck, look --
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[Chuck has a bottle of vodka in one hand and he's pointing a finger in Raleigh's face with the other and you better not say another word.]
Whatever it is, no.
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The frantic fervor of Chuck's anger both desperate and pointless. Raleigh is gearing towards anger too, if he's not there already, but for all the wrong, selfish reasons. Raleigh tries calming himself. He's gritted his teeth up until now, but he gentles his tone. ] You gotta know that's not gonna help.
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He glares at Raleigh as he unscrews the top of the bottle and following in his partner's shining example, takes a drink from it.]
Yeah? Since when are you the expert on that?
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He does, perhaps, but. For the first time tonight, Raleigh wants to put distance between him and Chuck, and even Raleigh knows that would be a bad idea. He doesn't know what the best idea is, here.
Tearing that bottle from Chuck's hands isn't one of them, but he flexes his hands behind his back anyway. ] We're all fucking experts.
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You're full of shit.
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Chuck doesn't want Raleigh to help him, would rather push Raleigh away before letting that happen, and it's that, more than the barbed comment Chuck throws at his way, that has Raleigh pulling his lips over a snarl and shoving past Chuck, away from the counter, just. Away from him.
If Chuck's looking for a fight, he's gonna have to throw the first punch, because Raleigh sure as hell isn't feeling charitable tonight. ]